Fear and loathing in Las Vegas

On Friday I left my temporary Provo home to spend a weekend in Las Vegas. I believe this sentence is supposed to stir up ideas of throwing propriety to the wind in wild abandonment, replacing a plodding, school-dictated life with a spree of lights, laughter, and irresponsibility. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, so why worry about what I may regret in any other city? I can be what I want to be and do what I want to do in Las Vegas. But alas, this city of money and facade has not captured my heart in such a way. Last week I had a pretty rough time of it, and I pretty much just wanted to chill and perhaps catch up on some homework. Sometimes I do seem like the most boring person I know. I had no desire to make the effort of driving 5 1/2 hours by myself to a city I had no affection for. But I did have a desire to see a good friend, and we had tickets to a Jason Mraz concert, so go I must.

The drive was pretty uneventful, and pretty peaceful. A friend would have been preferred, but it certainly wasn't as bad as I had anticipated. It was just me, the road, and my music for hundreds of miles in the desert. When I arrived at Sylvia's apartment, I promptly locked my keys in the car. Only the second time in my life I've done it, and thanks to AAA, it wasn't a big deal. But I did have to go with Sylvia to work, where she had to play Gatekeeper for the first show while I wandered the Strip by myself. Granted, being in Las Vegas for five hours by myself probably wasn't the best way of getting to like the city. I don't know if I saw anyone else there by themselves. And what does Laura do when you set her down on the Strip with hours to play? She reads for an hour in a Starbucks, watches the fountain show at the Bellagio, and then goes straight to the only art exhibit around. But it was $12 for 24 paintings, and after seeing a plethora of any art I desired in London recently for free, I didn't feel like paying. I spent some time in the giftshop, sat down in a comfortable chair in a miraculously quiet hallway, talked to some friends on the phone, read some more, and then set back off down the Strip, back to the MGM for KA.

Feeling some homesickness for NYC, I decided to stop into the New York, New York casino. On a previous visit I had already seen the Paris and the Venetian, neither of which compared to the real thing. But I thought I might as well stop in to see what this false Big Apple was like. And again, after having bitten into the real thing, I didn't like being offered this fake, commercial Apple flavor. It left a bad taste in my mouth. I hoped desperately that all the people enjoying themselves so much around me had experienced the real thing, and wouldn't accept the casino as good enough. I looked around me, feeling overwhelmed and oppressed by how much was being wasted. Money, life, emotions, electricity, opportunities, time... Nothing that is offered on the Strip will bring you lasting happiness. It is a spree, nothing more.

Maybe it's just me. I admit that I've never been one for meer entertainment with no substance beneath. If I had my dream of a movie collection, you wouldn't see many straight-up comedies in it. Perhaps with adjusted expectations, I could enjoy Las Vegas as others do. And I'm sure that if I gambled, drank, and liked to oggle women who flaunted their bodies for the pleasure of men's eyes and imaginations, Las Vegas would offer a lot more to me. But as much as I LOVE seeing my friend, and I respect her love for her city, I don't share that love.

KA is a Cirque du Soleil show that Sylvia works at, and it was pretty amazing. I've seen some Cirque before, on video or TV and such, so I knew what to expect. This one had a story, which I quite enjoyed. It was beautiful. I've never seen such hand puppetry, and I doubt I ever will. I definitely recommend it. And it was free for me! I'm really glad I got to experience it. James Blunt, who opened for Jason Mraz the next night, was not a disappointment, though he didn't play my favorite song. I do wish the crowd would have been a little quieter during the performance, especially during the heart-breaking song about war, but not many of them knew who he was, and therefore didn't care. Jason Mraz played mostly from his most recent album, which I'm not a huge fan of. I expected this, but did hope that he would sing my favorite song from his first album, "Tonight, Not Again". But alas, he did not. He was definitely entertaining and apparently had a lot of fun performing. And he played one song from his most recent album, one which I previously didn't much like, but when he performed it it was Amazing and I felt like crying.

I feared loathing Las Vegas, and therefore the entire weekend, but I had a pretty good time once I let my many objections to the Strip lifestyle sweep on by. I'm glad I got to take off and do something out of the ordinary. My feelings towards Las Vegas remain unchanged, but I've missed Sylvia and enjoyed spending time with her. There's certainly no one like her.

"I really do have love to give; I just don't know where to put it."

~Quiz Kid Donnie Smith, Magnolia

I drove into the mountains today with no plans. As I had walked into church this morning, I looked up and saw the mountains which literally made me stop in my tracks to gaze in appreciation. It was cloudy, so the tops were swathed in mists and the trees were all sorts of colors. It looked like something from a movie which couldn't be real, but there they were in front of me! I knew I had to drive into the mountains today. First, Christie and I drove up to Squaw Peak which was gorgeous.

Afterwards, we headed up past Sundance lodge, and just kept driving, where we found amazing, huge birch trees, all with golden yellow leaves, endlessly spreading over the slopes of the mountain. It was unspeakably gorgeous. Why have I not discovered this place before? Because I needed it today. I need to go back and take some pictures-- by the time we got there it was a bit too dark for that.

It was the perfect activity for the day. I've been feeling lonesome all weekend.

"I'm all at sea
Where no one can bother me
Forgot my roots
If only for a day
Just me and my thoughts sailing far away
Like a warm drink it seeps into my soul
Please just leave me right here on my own
Later on you could spend some time with me
If you want to
All at sea

Now I need you more than ever, I need you more than ever, now
You don't need it every day
But sometimes don't you just crave
To disappear within your mind
You never know what you might find
So come and spend some time with me
We will spend it all at sea"

All at Sea, Jamie Cullum