A close second for favorite solo.

My favorite solo of last week.

Favorite dance of last week.

Awesome Hip Hop.

You are feeling very sleepy...

Lately I have been having a really difficult time going to bed. I never want to go to bed. No matter how exhausted I am, I put off going to bed until I cannot STAND being up any longer. Even now, I was ready to fall asleep an hour ago, but I keep putting it off later and later. Part of this is surely just to do with habit. But part of this is something strange which I haven't encountered before. I think it's my bed. I kind of hate my bed. My bed should be a place of refuge. Something that I want to plunge into. Spend hours of time in. Because that's what we do. We spend hours and hours just in our beds. It doesn't matter that most of the time we're unconscious. We should delight in our beds. My bed should be inviting and comforting; something I love to give in to.

My bedding was bought the summer before my freshman year. I am embarrassed to describe how I ended up with the bedset I have. At that point in my life, I didn't know myself super well. I didn't know all of my preferences, what I liked, what my style was. And I was incredibly afraid of being labeled Uncool at college because I had unusual/uncool bedding. Of course, I had no idea what 'cool' bedding was. Now, I couldn't care less what other people think of my bedding. I know what I like and I am confident and unashamed of my style. But back then I was very concerned with what others thought of me. So I picked something very safe. Periwinkle and green plaid.

Now, this bedding certainly isn't ugly, and it has been fine for me. It just matters that it's there, not that it's the perfect bedding for me. Until now. Now I hate my bed. I don't know if it's the design that I hate or just the fact that it is the consequence of how little I knew myself 5 years ago. It is the embodiment of my concern for other people's opinions of me. It isn't an expression of me. And a self-conscious, safe, lack of confidence is not what I want to wrap around myself at night for 8 hours at a time. I would rather sleep on the couch.

The best number from last week. Mia again.

A little taste of trapeze.

We obviously weren't as advanced as these actual students of NTC. In the second segment, that's Susannah who graduated from BYU.

"This book is so awesome! This book can do anything!"

Harry and the Potters



A picture is worth a thousand words. I'll be back later.

My 2nd favorite dance from last week.

My favorite dance of last week.

Don't let your expectations get too high...

I Loved it. I was expecting to at least dislike it, if not hate it. But I loved it. I am so glad the director is doing the next one too, I really hope that doesn't change. Even though they left plenty out of the film, I thought the adaptation was great. It captured the spirit of the book which is something only the third one has had for me so far. I think everyone acted better, especially Daniel Radcliffe, I am so relieved. And he is really attractive. I feel like a pedophile. Imelda Staunton was awesome. And Helena Bonham Carter. I liked Luna Lovegood and I can't stand her in the books, so that was nice. It was pretty dark, which I LOVE. I think these stories have a tendency to go into cheesey territory, but this film did a very nice job of avoiding that trap. It made me cry. I don't think it made most people cry though. I loved how this film managed to really integrate Harry Potter into our world, if that makes sense. It felt more real to me. I mean, that goes away as soon as you get to Hogwarts, but it was set up really nicely. Incredible cast. It would have been nice to spend a little more time exploring certain things like occlumency or the centaurs, but it did give the actors time to really communicate with each other, let things hit them and so forth. I felt that this director really cared about acting and communication, whereas I think in three out of the other four films, spectacle and action were greater priorities. This one had the spirit. This is how all the films (except the third) should be. Hermione's eyebrows still need to be toned down a little.

People need to learn how to turn their freaking cell phones off before a film starts. One went off right in front of me at THE worst moment in the film that it could have. I wanted to smack him/cuss him out.

I get incredibly frustrated when I love a film and other people don't. Slate and I had the OPPOSITE opinions on just about everything in the film and it kind of boggles my mind. I think, how can he possibly think this way, what is wrong with him? Though I know, other people's opinions are perfectly as valid as my own. I just can't fathom how he could be so indifferent or how we could see such different things going on with the actors. And it makes me angry. Which is silly, but it does. And I wish I could call someone else right now who saw it and who liked it and talk over all the good things about it. Instead, I write this blog, pretty vaguely so as to not ruin things for others.

I am going vegan.

I will be easing my way into it for sure though, it's going to be tough. I mean, this change may take like a year or more to actually make. I have a few days to use up the animal products I already have, and then here goes with soy milk for one. I'll have to visit my local health food store to see what they have. Also, bread is really important to me, so I'm not sure how to deal with that. I obviously have more research to do. And goodbye eating out I guess, except for salads... And protein. I am working on building up my lean muscle, which aids in fat loss, and protein is important for that. So it may take me a while to give up my protein shake. I'll have to see how this all goes, I am sure I have overseen many problems which will appear once I start trying to be vegan. But here's a consideration: sometimes I go to other people's houses for dinner. Amy's house, or somewhere for Thanksgiving or something. And I know that even being a vegetarian I often put people to greater trouble. I don't like putting other people to trouble. So perhaps I'll just be vegetarian when I eat at other people's houses? I don't know, that seems like living a double standard, I just don't want to inconvenience those who are being nice to me.

Just some thoughts

My apartment is a mess. I still haven't unpacked and kara left for a week so I have no one to be clean for but myself. And I don't mind a little untidiness. But cleaning checks are tomorrow, so I get to clean the whole place by myself.

Flirting should not be allowed at the gym. Very uncomfortable.

It's hot here.

Instead of being Calpurnia in Julius Ceasar, I am now Casca, the "it's all greek to me" guy. I feel great about that. First rehearsal is tonight. Good thing, because I've had stuff to do every night this week but tonight, and I didn't know what to do with myself.

Living alone is great so far, except for at night.

I've enjoyed my wee break, but come on now, I need a job. My temp agency is not coming through on this one. And my sleeping schedule is way off.

Another friend from high school is getting married soon. Yikes, I expected BYU friends to get married, but high school friends? That makes me feel weird.

Makes me want to dance.

Sorry about all of those dance videos, I really just put them up there for me so I can watch them over and over again. I love So You Think You Can Dance?. And I really love that first dance I posted. If nothing else, watch that one. Mia Michaels is freaking awesome, and those performers were gorgeous. Since I posted it on here I think I've watched it at least ten times. This show makes me wish I could dance so badly! I really do want to find an afro-cuban dance class to take.

Sidenote: I'm on facebook now, and it took up way too much of my time today, but it's awesome seeing where people from high school are at.

Triplets of Belleville dance

Alright, since I found all those other favorites, I couldn't leave this one out.

the second-best group number

I loved last season.

the best group number.

Georgia On My Mind

Oh that Travis.

season 2 memories

Lex, Christy, and I watched some SYTYCD? tonight and reminisced about last season, which got me thinking... this is another Mia Michaels piece which I loved.

I love this dance.

I saw this dance three weeks ago and I still can't stop thinking about it. Skip to the dance, it's beautiful. I've watched it many times. Thank you, SYTYCD?

Into the West

The last week of the Intensive was Monologue Week. Which made things a lot more relaxing. No scenes to find, no plays to read, recording every detail that may pertain to your character, no rehearsals with your scene partner, no character work-- because I've already done it all. All of my monologues were prepared, which made my life a lot easier.

Monday I did Henry VI for Larry and Jennifer. It went alright, but it needs some work for sure. Jennifer was definitely harder on it than Larry was.

Tuesday I did Summer and Smoke for Larry and Daniel. Larry loved it. He thought I'd played the role before and when I said I hadn't he was surprised and said "well you've definitely done your homework very well. You know her." Also "you know how to turn the poetry of Tennessee Williams into beautiful conversation." He didn't really have anything negative to say, and I felt really really great. Later that day I did it for Daniel, and he was not so complimentary. Daniel scares me. Still. Again, he's the one that auditions us in February so that definitely makes him intimidating. But he knows his stuff, watching him coach other people's monologues that was clear. He's clear, concise, knows what he wants, and most of the time I totally agreed with the changes he made. I hope I responded well to coaching, it was kind of terrifying to be up there, and I felt like crap afterwards, but I at least hope I showed that I take direction.

Wednesday I did Grey's Anatomy for Jennifer and she liked it a lot. She told me she might steal it for someone, which I don't like so much, but it is complimentary.

Thursday I did Grey's Anatomy for Larry, who thought it was great. I felt good about it and decided to use this piece for the showcase. It's fun, doesn't really require much effort, just that I have fun with it.

We also had an audition class with Daniel this week where he told us exactly what we should do, moment to moment, when we audition for him. That's pretty awesome. If only I had that for all the schools.

Viewpoints was also this week. Fun stuff. As with most of the classes, I wish we had more time!

Our last day of Trapeze was this week and someone fell off! It was the very last thing we were doing, and pretty simple. Reggie (who is probably the most muscular guy in the class, and he's been one of the best on trapeze) and I were the last couple to do the swing we were working on, and his hands slipped and he fell, head first to the floor. I think his hair cushioned him, but he couldn't remember how he'd gotten onto the floor. A little scary. Class ended with a bang, but Reggie just had a concussion and was fine the next day.

Our last day of class, I went to the Market to get a muffin for lunch. I have loved the Market. It's delicious and has a lovely atmosphere. If you ever go to Denver, eat here for sure! It's on Larimer Square, easy to find. Bakery and cafe in front, farther in the back, LOTS of choices for real food. Here are a few pictures:





I wasn't nervous for the showcase on Friday afternoon until I got there and sensed everyone else's nerves. I think if Daniel hadn't been there I wouldn't have been nervous. And it turned out I had to go second to last which Sucked! Then I could spend the rest of the showcase just getting more nervous. I wish I could have gone earlier. But it was fun to see the work of the other class, since we've never gotten to see them act.


My class, the Sullivans. The other class is definitely more spastic than we are. They're more musical theatre. Not all of them, and we have crazy moments too, but collectively, they're just crazier than we are. I'm glad I was a Sullivan.

After the showcase (which was in the Jones Theatre, a nice little intimate theatre), they provided champagne for us. We toasted, mingled, and headed home to pack before our festivities of the night. Larry gave everyone a kiss on the cheek, I just love him. I would want to come back to this program just for him.


Here are two especially friends. We all lived by ourselves, so we bonded and spent many nights hanging out together. I got them hooked on SYTYCD? Vanessa on the left, Erin on the right. Vanessa lived right across the hall from me. Everyone who'd gotten drunk on the champagne became sober again in time to head back out to the bars and drink again. Here are Vanessa and Erin with Baby Guinesses. And we're sitting at the bar, for my first time. Other nights at the bar have been around tables, so I insisted we sit at the bar since it was just us. There are some interesting shots out there, this experience included Chocolate Cake shots (you drink it and then bite into a sugared lemon slice and it supposedly tastes like you're biting into chocolate cake, crazy), the Baby Guinnesses, which apparently look like Guinness but taste good, and Red Headed Sluts which have cranberry juice? grapefruit juice? I don't remember. They're pinkish red from something. I've learned a lot about different alcoholic drinks and bar culture during my time here, I've asked many questions. Then, at 10:30, we headed to Mynt. Laurence, who was our Hip Hop teacher, works at this club so he said he would get the couple of underage students in and provide drinks for all. Lucky me. This was the big group party, most of the students were there. It was also my first time clubbing. It was kind of crazy, but more fun than I expected.

And yesterday was the long drive westward. I made it to Amy's before the sun set, which was my goal. I listened to the 6th Harry Potter book the whole way, and missed the watermelon which I'd had on the way there. It was also less pretty. Probably just because I'd seen it before so it wasn't new. But very uneventful, which was great. It took 8 hours to get from my apartment to Amy's house. And despite the long drive, I preferred 8 hours driving to a few hours in the airport/on the plane.

Oh yeah, yesterday morning I drove Amber home, who'd slept over. She lives in a house in a neighborhood of Denver and it was so cute. If I ever move to Denver, I would love to live there. The houses were all different, which is so nice to see after Utah where every house in a neighborhood look exactly the same.

Conclusion: I'm so glad I went. I learned so much and met some awesome people. It was a really different experience than anything else I've done. I love Denver Center, I love the program, I love the teachers. The teachers are so good; they're smart, passionate, great teachers, active in their fields. I especially love Larry and Hillary. I love how they coach pieces, emotion isn't the most important, that will come if you're communicating the words that are given to you and really actively pursuing your objective and playing your actions. The program is so intelligent. And it includes theatre history and theory which I love. I love that trapeze is part of the program. I feel like this program is so well rounded. I feel like the people there are really working to create the kind of theatre here in America and for America that I have seen and loved in London. I loved living and working with the diverse group of people I was with. It was challenging, uncomfortable at times, but I feel like I learned a lot through the experience. And it was really enjoyable to be around such a diverse group of people who had theatre at their heart. I also learned a lot just living outside of Utah for a while. I feel like I have learned so much in the last month not only about acting but about life, myself, and interaction.

I can't wait to write my report for the grant BYU gave me. I recommend this program whole heartedly.